Saturday, March 04, 2006

 

Real life

Which is more important to you: to live true to your idea of who you think you are, or to behave in a way that is consistent with the idea other people have of who they think you are?

Comments:
I'll submit that most people will answer the former, but actually live out the latter. I know that I am personally torn between both. Though actually, I might say that I would prefer to live true to the idea of who I would like to be, as opposed to who I know I am. But that's a different question I suppose.
 
Freedom is the most important quality of humanity, and also the most painful one. The definition of an act of greatness is to sacrifice something very dear to you. Most people would like to have the admiration of others, or would even be happy with the attention of others. But the only way to truly stop pain is to get to the root of the problem: social identity. The mob is less satisfying than truly working at bettering yourself.
 
We're constantly growing, and our identities are dynamic things. I think it's dangerous to put one's self in a permanent niche. When kids are growing up, parents attribute a lot of their behavior to 'phases.' I don't think it's any different once one has become an adult. However, once you decide on a single identity, it's hard to leave room for growth without some cathartic event. It's like they say: "If you think you've got it, you probably don't."
 
Behave: to conduct oneself or itself: the ____behaves well...
to act properly: did the __-___behave?
a.conduct oneself one in a specified way. b. to conduct oneself properly
-American College Dictionary

Dilettante has absolutely no fear of giving the wrong answer. Doing so illuminates the correct answer by some degree. Doing what others expect is for those that reckon they can't afford to lose their televisions. It is the dilettante's prerogative to behave and answer the charges of a specific criticism, or when speaking bend the given message into a parallel commentary around the inside thrust of it...The dilettante is willing to take another for the self indefinitely until some nebulous lesson is learned or waivered...in this case it goes like one schoolboy jibing another: "Try to prove conspiracy! You're the criminal!" If I'm so criminal then why don't you investigate me!?" "Why don't you tell it to a forensic facial reconstruction expert!" "Why don't you go suffer from PTSD!"
When reviewing the deteriorated product of his executed diction Dilettante agrees that his shot pattern was loose & macabre. Though accomplishing the objective kill it was not closely grouped around the center and incurred significant collateral damage to downrange targets. The observers wished greater accuracy in accomplishing the targeted objective. Unintended targets of lesser tactical consequence were destroyed in the fusillade due both to misguided ballistics and poor downrange communication. The most sensible consensus for advancement in love, war and upon the frontier is that All is fair and one should rarely apologize, nor explain.
Giving the story to a forensics artist for reconstruction entire facial features were omitted from the Official at-the-post-office Wanted poster...This is because Dilettante, trying to be so painstaking in describing the countenance given kept glancing at mirror and swallowing with difficulty...
 
In 'real life' we are all many versions of ourselves. In order to retain employment most adhere to the version of themselves that best serves their employer's desired version of an employee while they are at work thus sustaining other more personal versions of themselves with the acquired shelter sustenance and entertainment. This seems to apply whether one's 'job'
is dumpster diving or nuclear physician. Even the most anti social among us will communicate our stance with the costumes and behaviour dictated by social and cultural expectation eg/ the hermit will often have a staff, go about unshorn and not surprisingly choose a cave for domicile.
 
Cool question!
To me option A is the best,but sometimes behave as they expect instead of how you would act is necesary,more if you have some kind of big responsability,like being a shaman of your tribe,or a politic,but I think doing that all the time would wear out anybody or could turn into a self crisis
 
I heartily advise all, to never be who they think you are.
 
live according to who I think I am because I trust myself enough to take in to account other ppls opinions.
 
I must confess that I derive a great deal of amusement out of building up a public perception of myself and then acting in a manner that is totally inconsistent with that perception.

I am on a continuing quest to discover what 'being true to myself' actually entails, and then doing it. I have become increasingly contented with life since I began this quest.
 
I present my true identity regardless of what others think or do. I am me and am not going to change just because the uniform majority of people have a different mindset. I take pride in who i am and if i do not conform to your uniform standsrds then tough. If you think im weird because i present my true self then i find that pretty funny. Maybe you should start living out your life as yourself and not how you think others expect you to react.
 
Great question! I wish I had read it before I saw my psychiatrist this morning.

I'd have to say the latter is more important to me, at least for now. I hope that someday I'll honestly be able to say it's the former.

The reason I say this is that my idea of who I think I am is unhealthy and inaccurate, and I'd like to learn to see myself as others do, and live true to that. Other people think I'm smart, attractive, funny, honest, generous, considerate, talented... and intellectually I think they're probably correct, or at least close. (That sounded so conceited, and I apologize for that, but it was necessary to make the point.) But in my day-to-day life I find that I'm constantly repeating to myself the familiar phrases from my childhood, telling myself that I'm worthless, I'll never amount to anything, I'm selfish and ungrateful, etc. To live true to THAT idea of myself would be suicide, and so I try to live up to what others think of me, and hope that someday I'll learn to appreciate myself as others seem to do.
 
I think in most cases it is best to behave the way most people want you to. I live in the USA & a society has been built that is somewhat progressive, moral, loves liberty, & allows anyone to be creative & voice opinion if they feel the need.
Although there is work to do, (there always is) this isn't a bad niche to be in.
 
How many people actually are what they "think" they are.
I would bet it takes a lot of soul searching over many years to correctly identify what they really are.
I would bet few achieve it.
 
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